Believe it or not all the current problems, miserable people, challenges in your life right now are there for one reason only and that is to help you recognise something about yourself that you can experience growth and become a stronger person. You change your life by embracing problems as an opportunity to learn and grow. It is the greatest gift you can give yourself.
The miserable boss who is always shouting and bullying you may be there to help you learn how to develop boundaries or express your feelings.
The people who keep asking you to do things that you can’t say no to may be there to help you learn how to overcome issues you have about needing to be liked by people or feeling worthy of what people think about you.
Why these things are happening will be different for everyone. There is no one-size-fits-all answer here. What you need to do is make the commitment to discover what the lesson is you need to learn so these things stop happen (yes they do stop once you discover the lesson)
I truly believe the more challenges we have in our life the greater the potential we have to be amazing because you will have worked through your limits to master them.
The first step is to take responsibility for your life by recognising that you have a lesson to learn. That angry boss is there to teach you something about yourself. You may find that you have other angry people in your life too not just your boss.
Begin to ask your soul for guidance. What is it I need to learn about this person, situation or place? Keep your journal close by and wait for instructions. Sometimes you may get a definite answer, sometimes you may have to write each day out in your journal until you see a pattern.
Here are a few things I had to overcome:
I had a need for everyone to like me so I constantly found myself doing things I didn’t want to do because I couldn’t say no. Once I recognised how I had spent my life wanting people to like me and why and I decided to choose another way and understand that if I said no and someone became upset that had more to do with their issues not mine. Saying no became easier. Most people respected me for it anyway and instead of losing people like I thought people treated me differently.
Another issue I had revolved around men. I had never been dumped and I recognised that I had a pattern. I would feel the need to be secure and seek out a relationship. Once I found the relationship I eventually began to feel secure but will also feel trapped. Feeling trapped led me to dump them and after a while I would lose the feeling of security and need it again so I would seek out another relationship.
I had to recognise first that security does not come from another person but from knowing myself well. I also had to remind myself that being in a relationship doesn’t equal being trapped (a limit I created from being in one relationship for 15 years)
Learning life lessons didn’t happen overnight and as one is learnt another one appears through a different challenge and so it goes on. Life will always throw things your way so rather than wish it could be perfect without challenges and problems, embrace them and see them as a rich tapestry of life and an opportunity to grow.