Ultimately you are the only person who has complete access to what happens in your life and how. As the responsibility lies with you so does yourSELF empowerment.
You shape you and it is important to realize that you shape you, not by what you know, not by the knowledge you have acquired, but by the actions you take.
In NLP we talk about people having a “map” of the world.
That means that everyone’s experiences from birth to the present day will form the way people think, believe and behave.
So if you were constantly told that the world is a big and scary place your “map” will be different to someone who grew up to believe that the world is their oyster.
The biggest thing that drives our map is our belief system and emotions.
If you are willing to open your mind to something different and look at a different point of view, you then have access to changing your beliefs that may have limited you in the past.
So your view that the world is scary as a belief may stop you from wanting to travel the world, or take risks, or put yourself out there to love another.
When you begin to work on changing that belief then you can begin to work towards achieving your vision.
The other major factor, your emotions, – also called your “State” in NLP – will be the one thing that determines your success or failure; whether a goal leaves you feeling fulfilled or dis-satisfied.
Our internal drive is determined by our emotion, and when we know what drives us internally then our goals lead more towards fulfillment.
The fastest way to get to know what drives you is to ask yourself questions, to coach your self in such a way that you instantly know whether you are making a decision based upon what empowers you rather than dis-empowers you.
What challenges us as human beings?
For many people the biggest challenge is how to take their vision and make it visible, how to ensure what they dream about, what their goals are, show up in their life, in their reality.
Remember the past only equals the future if you live in the past. If you spend your time talking about how you failed to achieve something, how things went wrong. Why it wasn’t your fault!
You can have all the reasons and excuses you want, and some of them may be accurate, but it doesn’t have to define you. You past is not, and has never been, your future.
If you have the drive and resources to achieve your goals then you become unstoppable! When you are truly passionate about something you can get through any challenge, you can get through to any boss; you find the money you need to fund your goals.
What determines our success?
Your state – your emotions – will determine what happens in your life and nothing else. What you focus on and the meaning you give to what you are focusing on will really determine whether you will be successful. Is the glass half full or half empty? Is God punishing you or rewarding you? Are difficult situations a curse or a blessing? Your answer to these questions will shape who you are and what you achieve.
Learn how to manage your state – your emotions. The important thing to remember is at any time you can choose to change by focusing on what is driving this current state of “not wanting to” when it comes to your goal and then focusing on your target, your motivation.
You can motivate yourself, and discover the answer to what you truly want by asking yourself “What’s next?” “What do you want in your life”; “What are you going to do about it?”
These are all questions that I ask clients to get them to realize what their vision is and realize the greatness they have within them to achieve it.
Right now monitor the thoughts that are going on in your mind. Are you convinced this really is too basic and it can’t be that simple? Are you telling yourself that you can’t find the questions to your own answers?
Trust me when I say that the only person who is in your own way is you. Fight to regain your power by believing in yourself enough to know that you can ask yourself a question and expect an answer and/or solution, end the programming that has you believing that someone else is more qualified to tell you what you should be doing.
That final question “What am I going to do about it?” will determine whether you choose to stay in the “I don’t want to” or “I don’t know” state or choose to get up, change your state to gratitude and re-live the excitement you will experience when you achieve your goal.
Increase Your Resourcefulness
Increasing your resourcefulness is exactly what I have just been writing about. It’s about believing in your ability and discovering the best course of action for you, based upon what you believe to be right.
You can instantly increase your resourcefulness through empowerment.
Okay so you don’t have the money to start your own business, how else can you get it? Who can you impress with your playfulness and passion such that they are inspired enough to give it to you? Who can you share your vision with such that they are moved to support you with their time or expertise?
Remember that your emotions – your state – is everything, watch your state, especially as it pertains to your goals.
There will be times when your emotions will tell you that you’ve had enough, that you don’t want to do this, that you may as well give up because it is not working. At those times recognize that you are not focusing on what you want, you are not focusing on your goal, your current target and/or your motivation.
Recognize that this is just your dis-empowering state doing its best to get hold of you, and know it is doing that because it wants to make sure you really want this.
If you really want something no dis-empowering state will be able to grab hold of you for very long. If you don’t that state will swallow you whole and have you believe you are a failure.
I know I want to be a millionaire. And what happened is my world made sure it showed me that I was not, this for me was a test to see how much I really wanted it.
So even in the times when I was not making any money, I had no work coming in, the credit card bills came in one after the other, and another bill needed paying. Even when all of that was happening I kept my focus on what I want to achieve.
I kept my focus on being able to provide my parents with money to enjoy their twilight years, being able to travel around the world with my children, being able to open a center for young people that will support them in their personal development.
This is I focus on, this is how I empower myself towards achievement.
Do It! YourSELF Empowerment Exercise
What’s next for you? What do you want for yourself and your life?
What is currently driving your emotional state?
Look at a goal you have not achieved and ask yourself; “What was driving my state?” If you wanted to save money but all you did was spend find out what drove your need to spend.
Look at what dis-empowering thoughts and emotions you had because it is important you are aware of what you do to sabotage yourself, and then look at your goal again to save money and find the one determining factor that will ensure you reach your goal.
What vision can you create that will excite you enough to save? Is it having £10,000 or more? Is it saving for a new car? This determining factor will be different for everyone and you need to believe you have the power within you to discover what it is.
If you have not used your personal power look at who/what can help you. Do you need to the skills of a mentor/coach? Is there an evening class that you can attend and learn about developing your personal power? What about a book to read or an audio to listen to.
Small steps is the key, just continually reading, listening to and making contact with people who are interested in self-development will be a fantastic start.
Ask questions of yourself every day to discover what stopped you in the past so that you can learn to manage it in the present, and create a different future for yourself based upon what inspires you.
That’s what do it yourSELF empowerment is all about.