I am pleased to support the debut novel of Gardenia Destang, Becoming Me, by hosting this guest blog post as part of her Virtual Book Tour celebration…
I would like to thank Diane for hosting me as a guest blogger, as part of the virtual book tour celebration for my debut novel, Becoming Me. In this blog post I share my thoughts on living life to the fullest.
In a conversation with Terri and one of her best friends Devon, Terri questioned him about a decision she made. Devon’s response was “not following one’s heart makes one a coward.” This is a very strong statement and has a lot of truth to it. There are so many of us who end up settling in life because we lack the courage and fortitude to follow our hearts and often resulting in unfulfilled lives.
Following one’s heart is not specific or particular to romantic pursuits but encompasses a much wider diaspora including our career paths, making important life decisions such as moving to another state, country. We grow up all having some indication of the direction we want our lives to go. The course we take is influenced by our parents, friends, and circumstances.
I conducted an exercise among some of my close friends a few years ago where I asked them whether they were currently doing what they wanted to do. There were about 12 of us in this discussion and only two indicated that they were currently working in the field that they had always wanted to, following their heart and doing what they wanted to do.
This got me thinking and I realized then that we were not alone, that there are many more cowards out there. I extended the exercise further and asked a few more persons outside of that particular circle. Once again the responses were similar, many were not doing what they really wanted to do, they were simply existing; not following their hearts or doing the things they really wanted to do. There are several reasons for not following one’s heart, passion, or dreams and these include:
- The fear of failure – what if I try and I fail? After I have invested so much what if I fail? What if I am not bright enough, young enough, wealthy enough, confident enough, brave enough? What if…?
- Uncertainty – about where and how to start, especially if a significant amount of time has lapsed from the inception of the dream, or passion has also lapsed.
- The timing not being right. Many believe that there must be the perfect timing to make a move. Everything must be in place before we can start moving forward and follow through on our dreams.
- Being afraid or overly concerned about what other people in your life may say. Some of us are afraid that others may think and feel our dreams to be unrealistic, childish, selfish or plain out ridiculous. There may be persons who instead of encouraging are very discouraging and unsupportive for whatever reasons.
- Settling for something else other than what we really want, because we deemed there to be too many obstacles or impossibilities, fears in going after what we truly want, desire, dream.
Borrowing from the book “Becoming Me” Terri was motivated by Mark Twain who is alleged to have said “Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”
What are you waiting for? What’s preventing you from following your heart and pursuing your dreams? If not now, when?
Gardenia is known for screen plays and her love for writing was given full expression when, on a whim, she decided to write her first book. While she wrote the book ‘Becoming Me’ for entertainment, Gardenia was cognizant of portraying issues that women can identify with, making it real. You can purchase this book, her debut novel, on Amazon at http://www.amazon.com/author/GardeniaDestang.
To find out more about Gardenia’s book tour – click the image below
Thank you for submitting your guest post to my blog Gardenia. I wish you ever success with the book and whatever happens next for you. For me being able to follow our own heart is an essential lesson to living a life we love. I know reality can sometimes be a little different when there are responsibilities to take into account but with a plan and a little determination something becomes possible.
I love that Mark Twain quote.
Thank you Diane for consenting to host my Virtual Book tour! It is certainly a delight being a guest on your blog. Thank you for the encouragement and support. I look forward to interacting with your audience.
I have been afraid to make a move because of the time not being right. I want to run my own restaurant but I have a great job as a chef. Sometimes it can be difficult to break out from our old way no matter how much we want to do it.
Sharon. Thank you, for your comment. I had a client who wanted to act but was stuck in a pen pushing job. She still pursued her passion on the side – acting in plays when she could – and eventually she worked up to leaving her job and now she acts in theatre more than she works in a job. Its a process and it requires progress. I hope you decide to follow your heart.
You’ve said it well Diane. Sharon, start with making small steps. Dream about it, write about it, share it with people in your circle that you KNOW will support you. Keep the dream alive and maybe not now but some day you’ll get the courage to follow your heart. best of luck.
I spent years in work I hated. I was fortunate enough to be told by an elderly friend of the family to seek out what I love so I look back in old age and am happy. Good luck with your book Gardenia.
Appreciate you stopping by Mia. I know you are definitely living your life by following your heart 🙂
Good for you! I wish more of us had the courage to do just that! Advice from the elderly is like gold! Having been there and done that or not, they have so much they can share with us.
Congratulations on writing your book Gardenia. Wishing you much success. I think one of the things I have been learning from reading Diane’s blog is to always focus on your passion as much as you possibly can. Being a realist I know that sometimes life doesn’t always work out that way!
Thanks for the comment Karen and glad I was able to help you 🙂
Thank you Karen! I agree. Life happens but keeping a focus on our passions, having plans, setting and revising goals are instrumental in getting us where we want to be, living out our passions.
Is it always possible to really follow our heart. That is always my question. Seems like a nice idea but how realistic is it? Congratulations on your book
Petula, that is the $64, 000 question! It is never that easy and sometimes the hardest decisions we make in our lives. I believe it is possible though, the question is are we always willing to bear the repercussion and most importantly are we able to LIVE contentedly with making the decision? So if you think you can’t live with the consequences of following your heart in a particular area of your life, then you’re gonna have to find other ways, other things, sources, to enable a life that is satisfying.
Sounds like a great book. What an exciting journey you are on Gardenia. I wish you well with it. Is this something you did by following your heart? I am about to start following my heart and writing about natural skin care. I had a blog in the past and deleted it and now I am making attempt number two! I keep getting a feeling that I should write about what I know.
I am definitely happy that you have decided to give it another go. I need all the help I can get when it comes to natural skin care!
Just wanted to say congratulations Gardenia on your debut novel. I wish you success with it. I am lucky enough to be following my heart when it comes to love and looking forward to getting married in April 2015.
Congratulations Gina! Thank you for your encouragement and support. I wish you and your partner a blessed and happy union!
Congratulations to you both Gina. Love is always worth following from the heart 🙂
Thanks Eva! Most certainly! My being an author was part of following my heart. You should give your blog a try. At least you can say I did it! You may discover that there are other things you want to do or want to include in your blog. As long as there is life and the means I say go for it! Then you can look back and say I did it! Gave it a try! I wish you every success!!!
I don’t think it fair to call people cowards because they are not following their heart. That seems a little harsh really. Sometimes our past events and issues hold us back that’s all.
It is true that our past can get in our way Aisha but when we truly have a desire to complete something it is important we learn to keep going despite what has happened. Sometimes you can use the past to push you forward.
It is true that life circumstances can somewhat determine the paths that people take. Specific to the comment and Devon’s use of “coward”, it is referred to the lack of courage to do something that may seem hurtful or unpleasant. As Diane pointed out, we can use the past to motivate us. Notwithstanding our past we can push forward, even compromising some, to follow our heart’s (careers, beliefs, relationships, personal development etc).
Just wanted to say good luck with promoting your book Gardenia
Appreciate you stopping by Don
Thank you Don for your support!
Thank you everyone. As a demonstration of my appreciation for the support I have received, the Kindle version is now available on Amazon at a very special price, for a few days only. http://tinyurl.com/kauwuac