Many people embark on a journey of self-improvement without really thinking about why they are doing it. It is really important that you know why you want to build self-confidence.

Have you ever longed for something and then when you get it, it is nothing like you expected?

Dorothy longed to be over the rainbow and of course when she finally got there she decided “there was no place like home”

So many of us long for a dream to come true, we long to be more self-confident or confident enough to travel and when we finally get there and it does happen we still continue to wish that life was different.

If you want to live your dream AND love your life then you need to know why you want to build self-confidence.

It is easy to think that you really want something

“I want to be more out going”

“I want to be able to get a better job”

“I want to start my own business”

“I want to be more outgoing”

“I want to be able to tell my husband what I truly want from him in bed!”

We dream of what life will be like when we achieve it, we wish that we were confident NOW and we long for the moment when we can finally do what we have been thinking about but most people don’t consider why they want something.

We spend time working towards something believing the fulfillment of it will be enough but what we are truly searching for is something far deeper and if we stop and think about what that is we can enjoy our achievement once it happens or realise that it isn’t something we truly want after all.

I spent years working towards completing an MBA that I thought I wanted because it would help me feel more confident about my business abilities.

When I looked at why I wanted it I realized it was to prove to people (and myself) I was intelligent – it had nothing to do with really wanting to live a dream but more to do with proving something.

Achieving the qualification will never have made me happy because what I really needed to work on was understanding that I am okay as I am.

In an effort to live your dream and love your life it is really important that you know why you want to build self-confidence so you can live your dream. When you are clear you won’t spend years working towards something you don’t really want. Or you do end up achieving it only to find you are not satisfied.

Spend time writing in your journal about the confidence building goal that you want  to achieve and what you believe it will give you. You might surprise yourself.